Provehito In Altum

The little wonders in one simple Saturday.

2010-03-20T19:29:00.003+08:00

You see, this campus brother of mine woke me up. Please note that the ring tone I assigned for his number is VERY alarming. Go and listen to it if you want: Jizz in My Pants, by The Lonely Island. Even better, watch the video.

So he invited me to accompany him for a little hang out because he was kind of stressed out. Venue? Sunway Pyramid. At first, Mary O wanted to join us until she fell asleep and in her mamai-ness, she muttered that she wanted to sleep and she giggled, to my surprise.

I went down and got into his car and we made our way to Sunway. It's a Saturday, so Sunway was somewhat packed it became pretty close to a pasar malam. He took me to Sakae Sushi, and ordered a few plates of tempura, sliced beef, unagi tofu etc. Bloodyhoney, being bloodyhoney, never failed to get smoked salmon sushi and fried (hotate) scallops.

While eating, he discussed various ideas to do for the day; e.g. movies (he felt like watching The Lovely Bones), a day in Sunway Lagoon dry park, or just walk around. I was clueless, and I left the decision-making to him. After lunch, we went to TGV and did not watch the movie because the next screening was at 6pm. We didn't go to Sunway Lagoon too, since he had something up later.

Walking past Cupcake Chic, we were tempted. I forgot what cupcake he bought but I picked this chocolate cupcake with two little marshmallows on top, and its name was On Cloud Nine :)) The name very much complements the cupcake itself! While we were eating on the mall bench, a little toddler was crying as her father held her tiny hand. She saw the cupcake in my hands and drew closer with a smile on her face!

Despite her parents grinning and muttering "Eii, tak malu...tak malu..." to her, she came closer and I offered her a bite. She carefully sank her teeth into the chocolate cupcake, smiling at the taste she just had. She walked off sheepishly and cried no more.

"Her parents should have just stopped by at the Cupcake Chic and buy her one cupcake," Zuan added. "Look at her; so fearless. She'd make a great PR."

Hey, Cory.

2010-03-08T23:20:00.004+08:00

This post goes to a wonderful drummer named Robert 'Bob' Cory Nathaniel Bryar.

Few days ago, My Chemical Romance fans were stunned with the news of his opting out of the band, due to reasons I have yet to discover. Chances are we will never know why because when the band's earliest drummer, Matt Pelissier was kicked out, the fans weren't really told why it happened.

I believed Bob is not physically fit. Just look at how many injuries he scored himself joining the band; a second-degree burn on his leg and wrist injury that was fixed through a surgery and with Frank Iero jumping and landing on him, that just doesn't get any prettier. Not that other members did not attain any injury in the process, but I guess the job became too dangerous for his own good.

Any way, as fans we respect his decision and we all give him our best. We love you, Bob-o-san! You have served the band so well and you will always be missed (I'm typing this as if Bob's dead. God forbid.). You'll remain a drummer I'll always look up to!

Fer-ghench

2010-02-26T21:54:00.005+08:00

Now that is a random title. Haha, but anyways it is a new fresh term to face. I am ready, I suppose. I just have to get used to leaving home for studies. Apart from that I am doing fine.

Returning to hostel with just Miera & Nabilla around, we spent our time with our Bangladeshi friend, Fuad :) He treated us Kenny Rogers, although we told him that he shouldn't. The last thing I know, he had to sell his iPhone because he was getting broke. Poor man. Allah will repay you back, you generous man ;)

Oh, and he is a really turning vegetarian! I don't know what type of vegetarian but he doesn't touch meat at all. Jared Leto would be so proud of him. *sobs* I'm sorry Mr. Leto but I effin' love beef and mutton.

" Hello, Jared? I'm turning vegetarian. Let's have some tapioca with sea salt and soy butter."

Being back at the constantly money-eyed Limkokwing, I am just delighted to be studying again and working with my colleagues but as far as the money goes, Limkokwing sucks balls and dicks and anything you can suck in this universe. New policy has been applied: pay first prior to registering. I managed to register for I have their scholarship but many students didn't get to register. How sad.

As soon as Josh, Farah, Lee and Maryam joined us, we had a hell of a good time.

I LOVE MY HOUSEMATES! THE BEST IN THE WORLD!

Period.

I've never been any thankful than now. They are such uber-awesome ladies. THANK YOU FOR WELCOMING ME :) i LOVE YOU GIRLS &HEARTS;

Other than that, we'll see what 2010 will be offering us :)

Gonna be 3 years and still rocking ;)

Simple act.

2010-02-19T16:54:00.003+08:00

All I did was just helped to clean the dishes the other night, and mother came out of the bathroom, acknowledging what I was doing by giving a remark I didn't expect to hear;

"Oh, thank you, Kakak. I will definitely miss that."

Dear Taiping, how reluctant I am to leave you,

and I am yet to be packing.

P/S: This pic was like, according to Josie, aged 4 or 5 donkey years ago.

Wrath of God [contains LEGION spoiler]

2010-01-24T23:49:00.004+08:00

And so I have watched LEGION.

Verdict: Pretty good.

There are a lot of hints before archangel Michael came. I think they just wiped out the element of surprise but acting-wise, the casts are good. Action scenes are good too. Not bad, really. It just didn't win over Sherlock Holmes. Haha.

I just don't get it why the angels have this metal collars around them. Their wings are rad, though!

Favourite scene: The moment the so-called hope for mankind is given birth. Archangel Michael was there with the hunted mother like a proud daddy (if only he would smile, but sadly he didn't) and it was so touchy ^^. Forgive me, but I am still a mellow girl inside.

Tom-tom-bak...

2010-01-21T01:18:00.003+08:00

I find tumblr interesting.

Should I change? No? Yes?

It looks very convenient.

Poly-Pac bags & Pallas shoes

2010-01-03T23:29:00.006+08:00

School is back! *cringes*

I can see the rather fair expressions on my little siblings' faces. Not so excited, not so happy and not so sad either. In between, I think.

Watching them getting ready for school pretty much reminded me of how was it like when I was little. I can see that my siblings get new school bags, new pencil cases (although my last sister kept referring to it as 'pencil box' when it is anything but), new shoes...almost everything new. They even got to choose the style they liked, and how these things worked etc. and I will later ramble about my own schooling experience.

Hummit (not my last sister's real name): *looking rather concern*
Ibu! You forgot to buy me a new pencil box!
(and of course, she doesn't speak English this good yet. I am merely translating.)

Me:
Eh, what happened to the old one?

Hummit:
It has holes already! I will have to carry it with me for my Islamic Studies class.

Me:
What is the problem if it has holes? You can cover the inner part with a plastic bag. Holes will be patched.

Hummit:
No, I don't want. I'm don't want to be humiliated by doing so.

Me: *jaws dropped*
Amboi.

Apart from that, my mother and I went on and on about other things like cleanliness, neatness, homework etc. But I was honest to my little siblings, telling them I was a lazy ass when in comes to homework. MWAHAHAHA. But still, I wasn't stupid. Just plain lazy. The teachers didn't like me much either because of my couldn't-care-less face, I suppose; when the truth is I was totally a very blur kiddo.

Anyway, I hope my dear little siblings (Hummit, LaiLai, Aebot & Kajim) will have a great year and do their best.

Footnote: Cannot wait to move out and have a pet kitten. Mom can tolerate! *happygilerbabs*

Jingling away.

2009-12-24T01:19:00.003+08:00

So it is Christmas Eve.

Here's posting a short blog wishing a very Merry Christmas and a happy new year to everyone celebrating this and hopefully everyone is in jolly mood :) I am! Haha.

Things I miss about Christmas:

1. The candy cane. It's been too long since I had one.

2. The Christmas flicks.

3. Being abroad. :D We don't get the snow here. Yuckies.

Well, I guess that is all for now. Be safe and take care, you jolly good people!

I know there is no Santa but I hope, in association with the Maal Hijrah, I want to ripen my writing skills back and back on Bullets with fresher stuff, better plots and I hope that I will get to use Photoshop very, very soon. I missed it :(

Maal Hijrah 1431

2009-12-18T01:49:00.002+08:00

Greetings and a Happy Maal Hijrah to everyone. It's another new year to look forward to. I'm not big on new year's resolutions but I think this year I hope there are things I can fix, and there are great surprises for me (and I don't mean surprises that will once again break me).

What do I want? Well, inspired by a housemate's note of her new year's resolutions, I guess what I want is pretty much similar. I want to strengthen my prayers, and try not to delay. Pray more, ask more of His help to assist me in my roller-coaster life, and perhaps gain a better vision of people's true intentions.

If X-Men were real, I would have offered to be some mind-reading mutant, but since it's not, I have to pray that I won't be blinded easily by sweet gestures, fake smiles, demure facades, and words of lies. My back is hurt due to too much backstabbing, alright?

I am praying, in addition, that I have a stronger heart. I know many people said I am strong enough but still, I want an adamant heart. I want a stronger sense of self-value, and a stronger resistance towards unnecessary things, and irrelevant people who are never worth my time. I want both brains and brawls.

Other than that I guess I pray for overall happiness for my family, and people that I love. May my beloved best friends find peace and happiness, and something to realize about now that another year is gone. I love them.

I am praying for this blessed connection I manage to sustain with so many people and I have nothing but loads of love to be given away. Even if I may not be loved fairly in return, it's okay. God isn't blind, nor He is stupid. ;)

"Pray to your God, Open your heart,
Whatever you do, Don't be afraid of the dark."
-Night of the Hunter, 30 Seconds to Mars.

"I sentence you to death."

2009-12-12T23:08:00.008+08:00

Stephen King's "Dolan's Cadillac".

I think God and people who are very close to me knows how crazy I wanted to watch this movie. It sucks it is not out here! So I have to rely to this thing called internet.

What happened? *curseswearcurseswear*

Bloody Streamyx let me down! I have a long list of movies I wish to download! ^%#$%@#$^&%

So I searched high and low for online free movie streaming, eureka! I got it!

Verdict:
Don't underestimate your enemies. Ever. Revenge can do so much!

Dolan's Cadillac is a Stephen King's short story. I found an old book cover for it.

So they made the movie recently and decided why not gave a sexier version of a custom-made Cadillac?

Even sexier now that this baby is bulletproof! Now I have fallen for the car. -_-"

This movie is about this super ego pimp; Jimmy Dolan. He does human trafficking business, catering for the prostitution industry.

An innocent school teacher witnesses his dirty deeds with a bunch of smuggled Mongolian ladies, and wants to call the police but she gets spotted.

And she is hunted. The police takes her and her husband Robinson under witness protection program, but after two months in the hotel, they get sick of it.

Dolan sends out his men to find her, and on one fateful night, she breaks the safety rules, rushes out to her car to buy pregnancy test kit, and...
BOOM!

Robinson could only watch.

It is a fairly nice movie. I just love the ending part when Robinson gets his revenge. To see someone so arrogant to say,
"I sentence you to death, for I only know two things- you don't have the stuff to kill me, and you don't have the stuff to kill yourself...",
falls finally.

Christian Slater is amazing as Jimmy Dolan. I felt like slapping him. What a f*tard! Wes Bentley is good as Robinson, you can really see his pain and his struggle.

WORK!

2009-12-03T00:55:00.004+08:00

On 2nd December 2009 (which is like two hours ago), I had my first working experience! Yay!

I've been holidaying for so long I guess I should just move this ass of mine and do something. After much asking around for vacancies, I found one. Well, at least I convinced them to hire me. Besides, it is a computer store and computer is always a passion of mine.

I began today, slowly learning from the seniors on how they run the business. For December I will be working at the Jalan Tupai outlet, and by January I should be working at the Tesco outlet; this is because my mother is my only way of going to work, or anywhere for that matter.

I am not ready to take my driving license, yet! *_*

The Tesco boss took me to the Jalan Tupai outlet, to familiarize me with the outlet there. Make quick friends with some workmates.

Today's achievements:

Made my first punch card (!), wiped off dust from ALL printing ink cartridges, swept the floor, wiped the glass surfaces, and made five sales. T_T

Shall do better in the future. Overall, I am feeling rather happy and comfortable of the environment, and I definitely have to thank Ibu for willing to send me to work and Azril for understanding my long working hours, and Unc. for believing in my capabilities

I love you all ♥

Masalah tag gambar.

2009-11-03T12:42:00.002+08:00

Aku tak paham minah Pakistan sorang ni la. Ish. Masa aku amik gambar dia, rilek je posing menari entah apa-apa. Tak pulak pesan jangan upload ke ape padahal tak silap aku banyak kali malam tu aku cakap aku nak post gambar-gambar tu kat Facebook. Dia buat muka Selenge binti Bacen (inspirasi nama ni adalah daripada Mary O.)

Bila gambar-gambar tu naik ke Facebook, dia buat la perangai dia. Cakap family marah bila nampak gambar-gambar tu, and family suruh delete. Dia dok bising la dekat aku kenapa nak upload and tag tak bagitau dia.

HEK ELEH...!

Nak salah aku pulak. Sendiri tak pesan awal-awal. Orang lain yang datang pun boleh pesan kat aku apa yg boleh upload, apa yg tak...dia yg banyak songeh. Dah tu, tulis status kononnya;

"i hate people tag me withoust asking me :@ plzzz people do not tag me."

HA! Nah aku bagi balik sebijik;

"NAMA BELIAU BERSERTA LINK KE PROFIL FACEBOOK BELIAU, picture tags can be personally removed and no one else can tag you anymore after that. If you don't want your pictures tagged, you have two options: TELL THE PHOTOGRAPHER NOT TO TAG, or DON'T TAKE PICTURES AT ALL :) Easy-peasy-pumpkin-peasy, aite?"

Kan senang.

Fragile: Handle with Care

2009-10-26T10:23:00.002+08:00

When I am typing this down, I am in Mr. Bong's class. I don't think I will be presenting, unless circumstances are forcing me to.

Literally, earlier, I was blown away by Bupe's presentation. What she said was so true. So true I could definitely relate to it.

Yeah, we are all imperfect in different ways. For instance, I am too transparent, too straightforward, too stubborn, too sarcastic and slightly emotional. Other people are probably the same or anything else, or otherwise everyone would be too perfect to be human.

Bupe mentioned about the history of Adolf Hitler and the Jews, and what actually drives people to take their own lives away; in other words commit suicide la. It is because people did not care, or maybe they never will. I was suicidal twice. Twice, man. Other people could have felt suicidal too many times. Twice is enough to push me to the very edge of death itself.

Why? The first one was because I was pressured so much by my family. The second one was a friend's betrayal.

Call me stupid or anything but seriously, those who are suicidal WERE stupid when they feel like it. Only during those times. But those who ARE stupid all along are people around these fragile souls who refuse to do anything.

They are ignorant as a sheet of paper. They claim that they are never approached. They claim that it is never their business. When they were sad, and 'don't have anyone else to talk to', then only they will look for who they favour. Not those who would be willing to listen.

I used to have a friend. Damn, I loved her too much. I was so aware about her feelings and tried my best to not do anything to hurt her. I trusted her, and never had any bad assumptions about her. Until one day she turned her back on me. And she still does.

I sat next to her for a class and there is never a simple 'How are you?'. The funny thing is, my boyfriend will get SMS-es from her and she will ask about how is he doing, and even funnier asking him if I WAS SICK. Like duh, where was I all along? Planet Mars?

Funny, no? How some people prefer to approach the hidden and ignore the apparent. Like how humans engage themselves with unseen forces instead of praying to God.

Clearly, who is much, much more pathetic? For how long will people be careless? Couldn't be bothered? Cowards? Mute?

I don't know about you guys but I definitely care about people I love, and I will care even more.

This has made my day, today.

2009-10-24T01:16:00.003+08:00

"People ask me to, uh, autograph asthma inhalers; I'm not actually asthmatic but, uh, I'll sign 'em. (laughs) You bring 'em."

-Mikey Way

Cyberjaya

2009-10-18T01:45:00.002+08:00

"Macam mana nak eja 'Cyberjaya'?"

- Amiera Fadly; my adorable room-mate.

I stared at her so intently ( -_-" ), wondering why did she ask me that hilarious question.

New play for Writing for Creative Industries update:

I will be playing Tinkerbell, from Peter Pan. I can't believe myself to be even saying 'yes' to such an offer. I shall challenge myself.

Ten cent.

2009-10-12T23:55:00.002+08:00

No, not going to talk about coins whatsoever.

TEN CENT = TENSEN = TENSION

Ada paham?

Good. Now what have fallen upon me recently? Oh, plenty!

Failures to respond positively towards my morning alarms, resulting to I'm begging my housemates to pull me away from my bed if I fail to do so.
Invisible nuisance. It's getting on my nerves. Especially text messages with endearments 'syg' from whatshername to my significant other and he doesn't even know how they got in there. EW. C****A S**L; and now it's playing 'seeing double'. @#!%&*^%$# JAGA KAU. Ditapis untuk tontonan golongan bawah umur.
Abundance of work.
ECZEMA. Dah tak lawa kaki den. Burok. Haha, not to mention medications that make me sleepy.
Shannon's first monthasarry. Makan Old Town je, tapi Mommy yang makan. DSLR mana boleh makan. Tengok je tau, anakku. Mommy ♥ s you.
The All-American Rejects. Go or no go?
Zuan and the girls begging me to go see Beyonce. I say, 'No, no, no...'

Tomorrow I have PR COMM exam. Alamaaaaaaak. PR WRITING was easy though, no thanks to the ubat, I slept during exam for 10 minutes even though caffeine was in my veins.

Alright. I have errands to do. Shall narrate more later. :)

Forgive Mommy for the retarded face. :P

I feel like updating.

2009-09-30T00:33:00.001+08:00

But don't have time to update.

Therefore I'm announcing updates shall be made when I have done with some stuff.

Grrr.

A stain that never comes off.

2009-09-24T03:46:00.003+08:00

And never again they gave us two shots to the back of the head.
And we're all dead now.

And we'll love again,
We'll laugh again,
We'll fly again,
and we'll dance again.

...And it's better off this way.
So much better of this way.

*I Never Told You What I Do For A Living, My Chemical Romance.

Maaf Zahir & Batin

2009-09-23T03:32:00.004+08:00

...is so over-rated.

Really. Can you really tell if it's sincere?

It seems like a trend to me; something to be said to complement Hari Raya wishes with zero actualization and sincerity.

And some people think they can get away with what they do then, on Hari Raya. I really don't get it.

Tak paham how apologies are now commercialized.

It should be done truthfully, face-to-face, with manners and realization of one's mistake. It is not something like hit and run.

Where is the sanctity?

Peluang

2009-09-12T23:06:00.002+08:00

Sebanyak manakah peluang yang boleh diberi?

Dulu, aku dah beri peluang. Keadaan masih sama. Tak berubah. Makin kritikal.

Sebut saja: pengkhianatan, penipuan, dibelakangkan, dicerca dari belakang...; semua itu aku dah rasa. Tak payah lama. Dua tahun pun sudah mencukupi untuk aku rasa semua ni.

Dulu aku boleh beralah, buat bodoh; kononnya menerima sikap sahabat-sahabat sebegini. Tapi lama-lama, tipis sabar aku.

Nak peluang lagi? Entah la, dah tawar hati sangat-sangat. Dah mintak maaf? Pakai apa? SMS? Surat yang dihantar melalui orang lain?

Hatta nak bercerai pun kena depan-depan. Lagi la nak mintak maaf.

Tapi pokoknya bukan maaf yang ditagih. Cuma hati aku dah tak ada ruang untuk kawan-kawan macam ni. Cukup lah; puas aku bodohkan diri, menjaga hati, mencuba untuk merasa situasi ni menurut perspektif mereka. Mereka macam tu juga.

Sebanyak manakah peluang yang boleh diberi?

Sebanyak mana sekeping hati boleh menelan dan menafikan apa yang mereka buat?

Meatless Hands.

2009-09-06T02:03:00.005+08:00

THIS is something I have yet to purchase. I DIG THIS THING SO MUCH!

Best Model Ever to don the gloves, who else if not Mr. Iero.

I think I should start looking for them again.

Lesson

2009-09-05T01:56:00.002+08:00

"Never, ever, take anyone you love for granted."

Trust me; when you lose them, there is no rewind.

This is by far the only thing I regret: Not being able to purely appreciate this old man; my late grandfather.

20

2009-08-31T01:50:00.005+08:00

He & I :D

Fuad: Why didn't you tell me Friday was your birthday?

Me: I don't go around and tell everyone when is my birthday, Fuad.

Fuad: But hey, happy birthday. *smiles*

Me: Thank you. *smiles back*

I was late to Pavilion on my birthday. So overwhelmed to see everyone there! Since I was late, it was expected that the ones who came early had broken their fast (and dinner, for the ones yang tak puasa). They went off to buy movie tickets (that's what Zuan told me =P). I had chicken rice with him. The rest all had different choices of food.

"Are you still there?" Zuan asked on the phone, and I had just burped with pride. Mwahaha. "Yes, I replied. "Okay, we are coming down," he stated. We waited for them to arrive as we all gathered for some chit chat and pictures. Azwan couldn't manage to try Nasa's camera. Maybe he was nervous. After all, he is a baby in the photography world.

We made our way up for the cinema. Movie picked: Imagine That, starring Eddie Murphy. Orphan was fully booked. Not so long after Sipa managed to smoke a cigarette, Zuan came and told us to wait inside the Glitters Cafe.

[ my favourite shots from my phone that night ]

There were a few bloopers. I caught the glimpse of my birthday cake. The waiter was bringing it to our table when Khalisa stopped him by giving him silent signals that the time has yet to come. I pretended I did not see it, for it would be bad to spoil everything that my darlings had planned.

[ Not Godfathers. More like Grandchildren! Haha. ]

Azril were busy joking around with his troupe. I think it was because they watched Godfather movies way too much. And not to forget, Bruno. The Lithuanians had Coke while waiting, and so did Ayu and a few of us. I wanted to ask for Coke but thinking I was about to go into the cinema, I changed my mind.

Diba was healthily communicating with Sipa & Tumis. I think Tumis finds her funny; but Diba is extraordinarily funny indeed ;)

Moments later, the cake arrived! I wouldn't say it was on flame but it had candles erected all over the top of the the cake; so you can guess how mutilated my cake was when I removed the pink birthday candles. They sang me birthday songs of different languages! Indonesians have two versions of a birthday song. Lithuanian sounded similar to the usual but different language-wise. I think I would love to hear Vara sang the Tamil version; since Azril is a Tamil hopeless. Haha. Oh wait, Kitz was there! He could have joined forces with Vara!

I took the first bite of the cheesecake, and passed around for everyone to have a bite. The cheesecake was heavy, though and it tasted good. We made our way to the cinema, and Zuan was like a mommy; he was dividing the tickets, telling I would be sitting next to Azril.

Imagine That is a good laugh, but it gives an impact within. Oh, and Nabilla told me that Diba slept while the movie was proceeding for good ten minutes. Haha.

We lounged at the balcony area (where all the bars are) after the movie, and those who smoke fulfilled their nicotine hunger. Those who don't were taking pictures and enjoying the view of the semi-blocked KLCC. Haha.

Vara & Ayu were very tired because they had been up since the morning, and so was Khalisa. Khalisa decided to drive home and we took off to McDonald's Seri Kembangan for a while. Nasa sent Ayu back to Cyberia, before coming to McD.

It was a night filled with love, and I was indeed happy. Thank you, darlings.

♥ ♥ ♥

Forgiving

2009-08-27T21:59:00.002+08:00

...is something I can do.

To forget is another different story altogether.

This is who I am, this is the shit I've been trying to fix.

If you can't take it, you know the exit.

Pre-Birthday Announcement

2009-08-26T23:50:00.004+08:00

Picture courtesy of ~glassaple

So it's officially just another day before my birthday. I wish I can celebrate with my family; two years in KL and two years of celebrating it while I was away. All Ibu could do is just call and send me cards. Next year, I think I should go back if nothing is holding me back.

That is not the main point of this blog, though. I just wanted to say something. During a class recently, I saw someone's little note for herself of what to do this week, and my birthday is the last one in the list. Pardon me for I have such sharp, noticing eyes.

Excited? Not one bit. Now, I don't want anything from Miss Libra and Miss Aries. Please. Don't give me anything if all you want to do is all behind my back, sneaking around, talk shit about me etc. I'd rather let the birthday passes without anything rather than keeping undeserving mementos from people like you two; or anyone who does the same. Korang simpan je la duit korang tu. Berjimat cermat lah ye? Sekarang zaman barang naik harga. Eloklah menabung untuk kesejahteraan masa hadapan :)

Apa guna memberi benda yang elok kalau pada masa yang sama menabur benda-benda, sama ada nyata atau pun tak, yang sekadar menambah perit di hati? Persahabatan jenis apakah itu? Hadiah tu harta dunia cuma. Yang aku nak cuma persahabatan yang jujur, yang boleh bawak sampai ke mati.

Thank you.

Puasa etc.

2009-08-23T03:00:00.003+08:00

The much awaited and blessed month is here!

Really looking forward to do some self-adjustments, all for the better of course. So far everything seems fine (how delusional of me, it has only been one day), but I can tell you I'm still working to decrease my profanities. I only curse after buka puasa though, just not on regular basis. LOL.

I was so sedated moments before the first tarawih prayer, and thanks to coffee that I managed to stay awake and hyper. You should see Diba when she's excited about the whole Ramadhan bliss. I had never seen any one cheering all the way to the mosque until I met her. That is supposed to be a compliment. Haha.

Other than that, housemate Lee is in her hometown, Sabah. We all missed her and really hope she is doing fine and getting better. Tough lass, she is. So much pain yet so rich of happiness and smiles.

"Aku ingat mati ni aja," she said and I just told her to think positive and go home, recover totally and come back whenever she is ready.

Gambar paling tak leh blah tahun ini. Mwahahaha.

Anyway, selamat menyambut bulan Ramadhan & selamat berpuasa. :)

P/S: Tak paham ape kes hanta mesej mintak maaf masa hari first puasa. Sebelum puasa tak ingat nak mintak maaf ke? Tunggu puasa baru nak? Nasib tak membawak ke hari raya. Bukan nak sombong la tapi kalau ikhlas datang depan muka la mintak maaf kalau ye pun. Ingat hanta mesej bernilai 12 sen setiap satu sms boleh bagi aku lupa ke apa kau dah buat dekat aku? Termasuk apa kau buat belakang aku. Fikir la dow.

MTV World Stage 15082009

2009-08-18T23:07:00.002+08:00

It all began with simple text messages from Zuan.

"I'll see you in desa :("

"Don't be mad at me ok. You balik rumah dulu.. Nanti I datang."

"Don't be mad. I didn't know what got into me.. I cried enough tadi."

As someone who is really concern about this non-biological brother of mine, I freaked out. Grabbing my tudung and my keys, ignoring my wallet and the need to change for a pair of better pants, I got into my hoodie and wore my orange slippers as I rushed downstairs to see him, much to my housemates' astonishment.

My eyes spotted a white Perodua MyVi, and immediately recognized this dude clad in green hoodie as Zuan, and a girl about my size who was obviously Khalisa. The other one with them became obvious after I approached them at the front parking area in my hostel. It was Kak Rokiah. In my head, I was wondering why was Kak Rokiah there? What's the biggie, right? Now I believed that her presence that night was just to enhance my nervousness, and it miraculously worked!

"Kenapa, kenapa?" My eyes gazed widely at the three of them when Zuan wept fakingly on my shoulders, and felt weird when I caught Khalisa giggling with Kak Rokiah.

"Eh? Is this a trick?" I muttered. At that, all of them laughed and Zuan took off the hood, unveiling the dry face. I narrowed my eyes at him, "I know that would be a fake cry. You didn't show me your eyes."

"We have a surprise for you," Zuan said, "Promise us you'll go."

"Ha? Go where?"

"Consider this as an early birthday present from us," Khalisa passed me a rectangular cardboard box.

"Apa ni?" I was as blurred as a blank paper.

"Bukak la! Bukak la!"

I turned the box upside down to find a way to open it. Once I lifted up the lid, there lay something I have never even paid full attention to. It was not only one, but there were two GOLD passes to watch MTV World Stage in Sunway Lagoon Surf Beach, on Saturday; 15th August. This incident happened on the same week- Thursday.

"What is this?" Yes, I was that silly to be asking such a question.

"It's a concert ticket. There will be The All-American Rejects, Boys Like Girls and Estranged! We know you enjoy those kind of thing."

"Are you guys going?"

"No, sayang. We are not. You know la kan we layan ballad, RNB and heartbreak songs. We don't layan this so much. You are the one that came to our minds when we got the tickets," Khalisa explained.

"Why are you guys not going? This doesn't feel right," I was still blurry. Poor them, I did not deliver the scream of excitement they waited for.

"It's okay! You go la, and enjoy! It doesn't happen every year here, you know!"

"I don't know if I can go or not."

"Josh have to take you. If he doesn't, I'll make him do!" Zuan stressed it.

"He has parents. If they say no, no la. I really don't know if I can." The truth is, I was in a lot of doubt. I was a jakun with concerts for I had never been to any. "Who else is there?"

"Yang I know tu je la. I heard Kasabian is there, and Hoobastank."

"Who's Kasabian? Tak pernah dengar pun. Hoobastank so-so la. I want My Chemical Romance."

"Maybe they are there!" Zuan replied, trying to buy my attention.

"No, they are not. I'm their huge fan, so I know what they are doing now. No concerts are yet to be announced. Not here, of course."

"But you layan The All-American Rejects kan? Go la, Hani. Please please please!"

"Ape la ni, Kak Rokiah? I ingat ape la, rupanya ni." I turned to her and all she could do was giggle. "Okay, okay. We wait for Josh," I took out my phone and called this lover of mine. "Dear, you must come down now."

"Apesal? Zuan okay ke tak tu? Nangis sebab ape?" he was clueless.

"Just come down. I'll show you."

He agreed and moments later, he appeared. Showing the concert tickets to him, he was speechless as well. "Sabtu ni? Eh, today dah la Khamis."

"Promise me, Josh, that you'll take Hani there. It's her pre-birthday present! You must take her!" Zuan also explained to Josh why Khalisa and him were not going.

After a while spent talking to his parents, Josh said that he had an absolute green light. I was surprised, yet thankful at the same time. It'd felt bad if we couldn't go. It's a bloody GOLD pass. It doesn't drop down from the sky everyday, and it's worth hundreds. Two GOLD passes can reach a thousand, and that's a lot of money.

"I'll go but please, take me away on my birthday. Please. I just want to spend the day with people I call my family. Please, tu je I nak. I tak nak lain. I just want all of you," I gave an ultimatum.

"Sure, that can be arranged!" Zuan smiled in agreement.

"Thanks, my darlings," I hugged Khalisa until she could actually lifted me up. "But you know your love and support is enough for me."

"It's okay, Hani. We just want you to have fun. You and Josh would make the most benefit from these tickets compared to us yang tak masuk dengan rock ni."

15th August 2009

Josh and I set off to Sunway Pyramid, and we watched District 9 first (second time for him). Yes, it is an unusual movie but it has touched me deeply. Nasa can never understand it. Haha. "Aku dok tunggu bila la cerita tu nak habis."

My nose made a slight problem because I just couldn't cease from sneezing. After the movie, we went to Starbucks to get myself a hot serving of Vanilla Latte, and I was glad it made me felt a little better. Josh had figured out where the place we would have to register before entering the event. It was at a hotel in the heart of Sunway. Many people were lining up, and I could see they were holding a piece of paper each. It looked like a form. Till now, I have no idea what is the paper for. Josh did mention something that for certain events, people who wish to be in the mosh pit has to be filtered for safety purposes.

We approached a crew and asked him of where we should be registering. "Tiket apa?" he asked us.

"Gold," Josh replied.

"Tunjuk tiket," he requested. Josh showed him the ticket and straight away he led us to a special route. I was busy keeping things in my handbag, and later gaped in awe to realize that I was standing in front of the famous Euphoria. "You see, dear? I'm in front of Euphoria and I can't even go in there." (There is a funny story about this whole Euphoria thing) My handbag was inspected because any recording devices were not allowed inside. As we walked further into the route, we were stopped to allow a crew to put a wrist tag on us prior entering. "Your hand is so small," the lady muttered. Haha. Tell me about it. :P

The mosh pit was almost filled, and the Silver ticket area was also already a quarter full. Making our way to the GOLD platform, I saw Kenalicious! He was in the mosh pit. Before the show began, we were served with music videos of the soon-to-be-performing artistes and FlyFM people were busy pumping up the crowd and throwing freebies to them mosh pit people. Haha, I wish I was there but I'd get a swollen eye if I did.

Not so long after that, we were entertained by this Malaysian act. Not Estranged. It's some dude lip-syncing on the bloody stage trying to do slick dance moves and Michael Jackson's moonwalk. He'd better thank God that I was very, very far. I could have thrown him my shoes. Turn off, really. Then the MTV VJs showed up (I only remembered Utt and Denise), and they told us that this recorded gig will be premiering on MTV on my bloody birthday. How flattering! After mentioning how many countries will be watching the recorded version, they welcomed Estranged to perform.

Estranged was amazing, to say the least. Boys Like Girls were great as well; and just when you thought they blew every piece of mind there, Raygun proved you wrong. They were so upbeat and the lead actually danced pretty well! He was such an entertainer with his dance moves and undeniably great as a lead singer! As far as the audio visualisation and lighting are concerned, both were superbly set.

When Raygun was done, we got to listen to a few famous mainstream remixes spun by a DJ just to add some variety. It wasn't really a total rock and roll show. The sun set and Pixie Lott came on to belt a few songs. I honestly didn't heard of her before :P I think I've been on my mp3 for so long. Because I take too much pictures, my phone died in the midst of her performing. "Alamak, dah la Rejects tak perform lagi." It was sad gila.

Hoobastank came first and I was impressed, *with fluttering anime eyes*, on how good looking Doug Robb was! I was never into him, or basically any dude with sleepy (you can call it dreamy if you like it) eyes. No offense to my Chinese friends. SJ, you are emo-zingly cute. That's why Maria and Nicole were your BRATs wifeys.

All hail The All-American Rejects! They arrived on the stage after Hoobastank (and long minutes of setting up their kits), and the lead kicked ass! Tyson Ritter looked like as if he was on dope. So magically dramatic and animated, not to mention the sexified "YEAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!ssss" he threw to the crowd.

He'd make an awesome porn star.

Chia Lim tagged me for this quiz

2009-08-16T13:48:00.001+08:00

So this is the result, except that I choose not to post on Facebook :)

Your view on yourself:

You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:

You are a true romantic. When you are in love, you will do anything and everything to keep your love true.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:

You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.

The seriousness of your love:

You like to flirt and behave seductively. The opposite sex finds this very attractive, and that's why you'll always have admirers hanging off your arms. But how serious are you about choosing someone to be in a relationship with?

Your views on education

Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.

The right job for you:

You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.

How do you view success:

You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.

What are you most afraid of:

You are afraid of having no one to rely on in times of trouble. You don't ever want to be unable to take care of yourself. Independence is important to you.

Who is your true self:

You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.

Major Decision

2009-08-08T23:56:00.002+08:00

And so I have registered for the new semester.

Relieved? Maybe. Much to be seen ahead. It is better to inhale the air now and appreciate what is, then to worry about the what ifs.

To begin with a new semester, I made a drastic decision. Never planned, though. I just thought I needed a new boost. So I moved out of the current apartment.

Nothing personal, really. I pretty much give it a try. Besides, I changed into this new room for free. Praise God. The management is suddenly so nice. I hope it is some sort of a good luck charm for a good start; for a good book.

I have picked Public Relations as my major. For the previous semester I got an A for Public Relations Principles, which convinces me that this is my turf. Of course, I love working with people. I love interacting. I can't really sit and forced my brain to think of new methods to sell things. I can't even stand promoters, let alone becoming one.

I even have a class with Mr.Bong. Amin said it will be bundles of fun. Haha, I hope so, buddy ;) It's just sad that I don't have a class with my dearest Khalisa, except for Malaysian Studies! There is this subject that I am taking now that she will only take next semester. How bummer :(
To think on the brighter side, we all have Malaysian Studies and this time it'd better happen. Haha.

Day one at the new house: I feel great! I feel at home. I pray to have ongoing peace with the new house and housemates.

Convent girls, I miss all of you :(

There is saying...

2009-08-07T19:36:00.003+08:00

"Behind a successful man, there is a woman who makes it happen."

True, but this is another saying that somehow popped in my mind concerning some men who were predicted to be fantastically successful- but still hasn't.

"Behind a probable prospective man, there can be a woman who can crush it all."

HAHAHA. Sad, no?

Kata-kata ini diterbitkan oleh minda saya yang banyak menerewang sewaktu termenung, tidak kira di dalam bas, atau pun ketika menunaikan hajat. Jadi, ianya tidak berkenaan dengan mana-mana individu secara tepat. Harap maklum, jangan terperasan. Hehe.

Sebenarnye...

2009-08-01T23:49:00.003+08:00

...aku malas nak blog pasal benda buang masa ni tapi sebab aku banyak masa nak dibuang ni, aku blog je la. In case kawan2 aku nak tau satu kejadian bodoh yg telah mengambil tempat di Facebook.

Kisahnye macam ni...

Kawan aku letak status. Aku komen la. Secara jujur, komen tu sebenarnya berunsur lawak. Aku siap selit 'hehehe' lg kat belakang.

Tiba-tiba, kawan kpd kawan aku ni hangin tak pasal2. Entah la hari tu die PMS kot. Aku malas nak pakai kata2 kesat, dan dia pun bunyi provocative giler. Atau pun memang bunyi seakan-akan gila.

Adakah rasional dia tuduh aku jealous tak diajak ke Sunway main Ice-Skating punca nya aku jokingly gelar kawan aku tu lesbian? Muka kemaruk sangat ke aku ni nak orang usung aku? What the hell, kan? Aku panggil dia mcm tu lawak2 je, selama ni die tak kisah pun. Josh pun dia boleh gelar anjing, so ape salah aku panggil dia lesbian? Still manusia kan? Bukan haiwan.

Tak habis dgn tu dia lantas dengan sungguh tidak profesional nye menyentuh hal-hal tak berkaitan, contohnye, mempersoalkan kewujudan teman2 akrab dalam hidup aku. Gila ape? Aku punye kawan pun nak cedok gak ke? Dia pun aku tak cedok, bukan main nak cedok pasal tu. Aku ade best friend ke, tak de ke...ade kena mengena dengan kau ke?

Dah pulak tu aku balas aku tak perlu prove apa-apa kat dia, dia boleh panggil aku idiot. Sekarang cakap, siapa start dulu? Mulut aku tak kan sumpah seranah kalau tak de yang start dulu. Pantang aku guna bahasa kesat, melainkan dicabar. Aku bagi la bahasa kesat dekat dia kaw-kaw.

Tapi kan bila nampak gaya nya perempuan yang mempunyai kestabilan emosi yang sangat menjengkelkan ini tak nak berhenti melalut, aku pun malas nak layan. Senang cerita, aku click aje 'Report this person' kat Facebook, dengan butiran lanjut kenapa aku berbuat begitu. Aku jugak mengaku pada Facebook aku guna bahasa kesat, dan dah padam apa yang aku post-kan supaya tidak menyinggung orang lain.

Biar je la Facebook layan dia. Malas aku nak layan. Sampai kiamat pun tak habis.

...and to answer her question; Yes, you can defend your best friend in what ever way you may but if you are questioning about my actions, which supposed to be a joke, ask your best friend if she has ever defended me.

Once upon a time, she complained to a friend that she felt left-out by me. So I texted her, asked her how she was, apologized etc. She treated them as a joke. She replied as if I was delusional about the whole thing. Do you know how it made me feel? I can't even describe how upset I was. A thank you would not hurt, I believe.

Once upon a time, when she kept telling Josh to leave me, together with all the nasty remarks about me that she has said to him, and Josh didn't leave me at all- she said he was stupid. What kind of a friend does so to a friend?

Once upon a time, when things were okay, when I was still blind, some colleagues asked me about her, and how I can even end up with her. I was never ashamed of her. I defended her. I told them the good within her that they didn't see. But they were right, as time flies.

Once upon a time, when I busted my ass working for a group assignment...-

Ya Allah.

I can't even go on. I felt too sad. Too upset. Too drowned in my tears.

Ask yourself. Who leaves out who?

I only defend the ones worth defending.

Screw Edward Cullen, I Want Ricky Fitts.

2009-07-25T01:03:00.006+08:00

(click pictures for better view)
"Ricky Fitts is the hottest (fictional) guy alive. He has piercing blue eyes, a sweet voice, and a smoking bod. He also has something that Edward doesn't: depth. So he isn't a vampire; that's okay. He has a personality, which is more than I can say for Mr. Cullen.

Could Edward Cullen find beauty in a floating plastic bag? I think NOT! Clearly, Ricky > Edward."

The description in this group just made me laugh! But seriously, he could have made a better Edward Cullen ;)

The actor la I mean. Not Ricky Fitts. It's Wes Bentley :) His portrayal of Blackheart in Ghost Rider movie, amidst the dissatisfaction of how Blackheart appears from hardcore fans of the comic; he looks good pale, with vague bluish veins and jet black hair, and super awesome vintage clothes!

No Gnome

2009-07-24T19:24:00.003+08:00

Taken from the movie Weirdsville.

Dexter: How'd you knock him out?
Royce: I hit him with that elf thing that we broke in with.
Dexter: Gnome.
Royce: Yeah whatever. What is it, a leprechaun?
Dexter: Gnome.
Royce: You know what I mean, like that smurf thing that I hit the window with?
Dexter: Not smurf - gnome.
Royce: What are you saying, man? Why don't you just tell me? You keep saying no.

[they stare at each other and then start laughing]

Haha, awesome quote!

2009-07-23T18:05:00.002+08:00

"I am optimistic and sentimental to the point of being annoying, especially to people who think that being cynical and cold is cool."

- Yasmin Ahmad.

It's International My Chemical Romance Day, and the third year, to be exact. It is funny the band's bassist is only aware about it after two years! Haha.

Misteri Kehilangan Air

2009-07-21T15:49:00.002+08:00

Malam semalam, Ibu panaskan air. Sampai penuh electronic flask tu.

Lepas tu, selepas beberapa jam, ibu pegi dapur nak buat air. Terkejut dia tengok flask tu kosong!

Aku yang tak tau ape benda pun terkejut jugak. Haha.

Mula la sesi CSI, belek atas bawah flask tu, memikirkan logik ke mana air tu dah menghilangkan diri. Tak ada bahagian bocor, tak ada kesan basah di mana-mana.

Aku dengan ibu lagi la rasa pelik. Ibu bagi teori flask tu dah rosak dan dah rebus air sampai kering. Aku pulak bangkang, berserta fakta-fakta Sains (ye la, SPM Sains dapat A1 tau!). Mustahil la kering dalam cerek, habis mana wap air tu semua pegi? Kan? Kan?

Lantas, tanpa banyak songeh, ibu panaskan air sekali lagi, nak melihat misteri kehilangan air tu. Yang menariknya, sampai di saat aku taip blog ni, air semalam masih ada. Haha.

Tiba-tiba, adik aku yang Tingkatan 4 tu ketawa terbahak-bahak. "Aku ambik air tu buat ais la!"

Ceh. -_-"

I have taken a closer look :)

2009-07-20T23:10:00.005+08:00

I remembered when TV3 kept airing it, I missed the earlier parts and only get to witness how this key character of the movie named Lester Burnham (Kevin Spacey), died. Haha.

I think what made me even more interested in this movie since forever, is after watching this character who goes by the name Ricky Fitts. His weird behaviour and interests are just plain cute. He videotapes the most random things ever and sees the beauty in what he films, too much beauty, that he can just cry. Bunyi gila tapi ada la betul jugak... Not to mention he even grow up in such a disfunctional family: an only child living with a super-strict, ex-military father and a very rigid, quiet & passive housewife as a mother. Aku sangat bersimpati terhadap mak dia. Muka banyak masalah dan kesedihan :(

Daddy controls everything :(

Daddy tells Ricky gays are shameful.

Lester has a wife, Carolyn (Annette Benning) and she is a real estate agent who is driven by the idea of wanting to be successful, and refuse to show her weakness. A woman who is perfectly living in denial. She thinks she has a loser as a husband and finds solace (and sexual excapades, haha), in her own real estate competition, Buddy Kane. Lester and Carolyn have a daughter, Jane; this girl is unhappy with her breasts and saves money for a boob job!

Queen control.

Trying to be the perfect mother.

Carolyn caught cheating by Lester.

I honestly salutes her and Ricky, because they work on their own to gain what they want! The difference is Ricky sells weed for people, until he can collect around US$40, 000. Gila kaya woh...

Note for everyone: Don't sell illegal shit. You might never get caught but still, gaining profit from other people's misery is not very nice :)

Okay, back to the whole review; Ricky likes Jane, and she eventually finds him interesting. Come on, who wouldn't love someone who stands by his window, just interested in what you do everyday, and films you because he thinks you're beautiful the way you are, and goes out burning the grass forming your name with the fire? Or even still interested with watching you, admiring your beauty, even when you tell him to stop watching you?

Ricky filming Jane.

Jane, on the other hand, has a friend so attractive, known as Angela Hayes, a model wannabe, who thinks she will go to the top just by sucking up and fucking famous people. Lester likes Angela, and tries to get her attention. So this is when everything unfolds.

One of Lester's fantasy about Angela XD

This movie looks shallow, but if you look closer (that's the movie's tagline), you'll definitely see the true beauty of the film. You'll understand why Lester feels like a loser and suddenly bounces back into a better person just because he tries to impress Angela, why Carolyn is so cold to her husband but nice and pretentious to everyone else, why Jane hates her parents, why Ricky's father is so hard on bringing him up, why his mother is so defenseless and why Angela adores the attention she gets from every man.

It's a movie about the phoniness in people, the fake faces, the struggle just to be themselves despite being labeled a weirdo or a rebel, the lies told just to be accepted and the pain within each one of us that we are all trying to overcome.

Anyway, I was happy for Lester; because he died feeling happy, even though he was shot at the back of his head when he least expected it, he managed to be happy at the very final second just looking at an old picture of his family when Jane was little, and happy knowing Jane is feeling loved with Ricky by her side, knowing that his wife is happy with another man, and happy that he did not do anything with Angela, realizing it is a wrong thing to do.

My favourite dialogue of this movie=
Ricky: If I leave tonight, to New York, will you come with me?
Jane: (smiles) Yes.

It is so beautiful, really.

...and great line of cast too!

Wow!

2009-07-19T00:23:00.002+08:00

Yes, "Wow!" is the phrase that has been stuck in my head ever since this one Indian dude in Ipoh Parade parking lobby exclaimed so upon seeing me, much to my surprise.

It was when my mother decided to go to the ladies' a floor above in the mall before driving home. My two little sisters tagged along, leaving me and my two younger brothers in the parking lobby. The boys were busy with their own light conversations and jokes, and I was just standing quietly a few feet away from the elevator.

Then, there were two Indian dudes coming down the elevator, and I was just merely looking, taking a few glances here and there. When they saw me, one of them suddenly exclaimed "Wow!", but not that loud of course. Gila kot kalau lagu tu... I turned around, feeling so awkward at his reaction, just in case I was perasan. But there was nothing else around me; just some plastic plants. I shifted my sight back to them, and they realized they were in the wrong floor. They took the other elevator and as both of them slowly moved up, the one who WOW-ed turned around to look at me with a smile and a nod, before walking away.

What the hell. Haha. Pelik, pelik. Does he know me? Haha, I have no idea.

Anyway, I did not manage to meet Zuan in Ipoh. Apparently he had something holding him back, but even worse my phone died in the middle of the day, because of too much music and too much snapping pictures.

I only spent my money on a yellow polka dots hoodie from the kid's department in Kinta City shopping mall (fondly known as Jaya Jusco), and a pair of dark brown khaki pants from SEED kids. Well, where else can I purchase clothes of my size if not there?

Hazel Cheese cake.

2009-07-12T21:32:00.003+08:00

So, we celebrated Ibu's birthday on a day earlier. Haha, it was her decision by the way. She said on her birthday she wants to fast, so she can enjoy the cake for sahur as well :)

Hurrying up, I went through the options of the cakes available on the pick-up day that the kakak at Secret Recipe had pointed out to me. After some brief reading of the descriptions, I picked Hazel Cheese cake.

That's my hand smeared in hazel sauce *drools*

I have to say, the cake tastes awesome! It's not heavy, not too light and acceptable for people who don't really favour the heavy cheese flavour. My family kept taking second and third slices!

Worth the shot! Haha.

I even splurged on these Goggles shirts; I had to. It's on sale. Don't try to understand, it's a girl thingy. Haha.

Jalan-jalan at Taiping Sentral, I spotted a few interesting things to snap.

Brother get sister free? Incest much?

A very complex yet hilarious medication! My brother and I just had to laugh out loud in Watson's.

Interesting brand for apparels. Magazine & Coffee. Two of my favourite things ;)

You're just a sad song with nothing to say.

2009-07-07T22:06:00.005+08:00

I used to be close to this girl. I still remember her well. I guess I wouldn't know her if I didn't befriend this Chinese-Indian dude named Sabanjiven in my Form 3 Science tuition, haha. I used to find him cute and thought he was a Malay; obviously because he is mixed. He had this dream of becoming a well-known singer with his Thai-mixed cousin, who wanted to be a well-known DJ! Ambitions; aren't they fun? If you care to watch DiGi Celebriteen (I don't remember what year), he was one of the contestants. Now when I look at him, he has changed so drastically! His commercial name is now BEN. I didn't have pictures of him because who bothered to take pictures of some guy who went to the same tuition with you, right? Or is it just me not bothered? Anyway, managed to steal this picture off his blog;

(Saban @ Ben; far left)

Back to the actual topic, this Chinese friend of mine I knew in school, goes by the initials CMP. So P, if you Google yourself, good luck finding this blog :)

She is actually an okay person, (or am I the only one who thinks she's harmless?) but she took the whole 'trying-to-fit-in' phase way too far to turn back. Can you imagine all those stories and the people she told me she knew were all lies? I don't blame her, but I just think she might have wanted attention. She just did it in the most wrong ways possible. To her, to be admired is to be accepted and loved. Her parents are old, and you know la how old people are. Very judgmental.

I think Noien was the one who managed to confront her and scolded her in public for her lies. Memang kitorang ternganga tengok Noien time tu. Dalam hati aku boleh mengucap je kot. Haha, siapa tak kenal Noien punya perangai? Memang hang kena la dengan dia kalau cakap tak betul, mengumpat-ngumpat ke, cakap belakang ke...sebab dia tak takut. Aku ni nasib je la tak sampai tahap tu. Maybe aku kena belajar la dengan Noien macam mana nak bantai orang. Aku jenis tak sampai hati. Dah tau kena kutuk belakang-belakang pun boleh buat muka kanak-kanak riang dengan orang tu. Aih, sedih no?

After her tales were exposed to be just mere made-ups, she kept a low profile. She disappeared. It was almost SPM, by the way. Students just didn't have to be present for school. When she finally made an appearance, she and I had this talk. She said she understood if I choose to ignore her. I just told her to change and that she didn't have to lie. No one will discriminate her for who she actually is. I mean, I'm not that bloody rich. I don't have to be rich and claim I know famous people to be admired and accepted, or even loved. She doesn't have to, as well.

The last thing she told me was that she would try to change. I was a teeny bit glad, and I hoped she would make it to be perfectly fine on a clean slate. We continued to be friends when other people didn't want to be seen with her. She even told me to please do not forget her; which to this day, I never did.

I wonder where she is now. My friends told me that she was still in Taiping, not doing anything, ignoring people, and pretending that she didn't see them. It was all rumours, you see, but if they were true, I believe she has a reason. Maybe she was ashamed that she was still there, and other people are going places to further studies.

If so, I think she shouldn't be thinking that way. I mean, who knows what is in store for her? I've heard some ugly things about her but then I'd love to see if they are true. Or if she would still lie.

Two years since, I've never really got broken-hearted by friends until I entered college. I thought I wasted my time knowing them but then again, maybe if I didn't know these friends who are using me, lying to me, backstabbing me, secretly trashing me etc., I might never learn.

Thank you. I've learnt a lot about life and people, in general, by knowing you people for the past two years. I felt pity for the people who have not seen that side of you. Really.

Get well soon, Ezziq.

2009-07-07T16:10:00.004+08:00

When the previous semester was still on, this friend of mine who goes by the nickname Ezziq, got sick once in a while. We thought it could be early signs of dengue, or swine flu (I don't remember who actually suggested this terrible disease) or maybe she was too stressed with assignments; regarding that she had some disagreement with a lecturer.

This afternoon, Zuan texted me, saying that Ezziq is hospitalized in HUKM. She was diagnosed to have tumours in her ovaries (naudzubillahiminzalik), and chances are they can be cancerous.

My goodness.

I remembered the last time I met her. She had taken her final examinations and I was waiting in the faculty to kill some time before my final examination took place.

Maybe I will go and visit her this weekend. Yeah, I've been with friends for months and only get the final semester break with my family, but I think my family can understand. Ezziq needs support. She was there for me, so I shall be there for her.

You hang in there, buddy. You are a brave, strong lady. You can beat those tumours; I know you can.

My prayers will always be with you. Don't ever, ever, ever give up.

L-R (Khalisa, Zuan, Ezziq, me.)

Love Is Like Oxygen.

2009-07-06T16:33:00.002+08:00

"Without you is like having semput."
- Bucuk (nama sebenar dirahsiakan)

To wake up in the subuh and reading this message is so flattering!

:) Without you is like having a caffeine-desperation for me too, dear.

Settling for a D5000?

2009-07-05T19:16:00.005+08:00

Maybe I will. I have not made up my mind.

Went out and about for a drink with my family the day before, and if I go to Taiping Sentral, I just have to visit this photo shop (they don't print pictures I think since all I can see is just a variety of cameras and other visual capturing devices on all display cupboards). The funny thing is that I, to this date, never remembered to memorize the name of the store.

Note to self: I shall memorize it when I go for a next visit.

I was looking for a Nikon DSLR D90, but there were only D60 (that is what Nasa is using) and a D5000. I squinted, reading the specifications of the model, and realized it is similar to D90.

But what makes it different?

I looked at the price. RM 3288; and I went "What the hell? It's cheaper than D90?" I knew the last time I surveyed for D90, the best price you can have is at painstaking RM4000. One Malay uncle in LowYat Plaza was willing to sell a D90 for RM4119, WITHOUT a bag. Much to my surprise, a Chinese man at the same place was selling the same model for RM119 cheaper, WITH a bag.

I texted Nasa, and he claimed it was an incredibly great price for a D5000, literally saying, "Waahh...ok r tu..sebat jea."

Still undecided, I surfed the web for results of the comparison of both D90 and D5000. It appears that D90, despite being the earlier baby, is still winning. It's actually pretty complicated.
D5000 is standing in between D60 (better than D60) and D90 (this model is a winner).

My college buddy Raditya suggested that I take D5000. Not sure why; he said specifications-wise, D5000 is offering more than D90. It has this swivel-screen, slightly cheaper and all, but still, I am undecided.

I am pretty much undecided about most things in my life, actually.

Then how ar?

Tikus Punya Pasal

2009-07-05T01:48:00.002+08:00

"Bila-bila Opah nak kemas semua barang-barang. Biar lapang. Takdak la tikus dok menyorok."

-Opah

Well, masalahnye Opah, kalau lapang nanti Opah macam bagi tikus-tikus more space to play kejar-kejar.

Trust me, I've seen what kanak-kanak riang rats can be. Haha.

Indonesian TV3

2009-07-04T02:30:00.002+08:00

"Kakak, we are in Indonesia. TV semua takde transmission and we get Indonesian channels. Apa la..."
- Ibu

Hahaha. Sod ba ro je la, Bu.

Over

2009-07-03T18:25:00.007+08:00

One thing that I learned after entering college, and befriending some tormenting homo-sapiens, I can see that people are funny.

Really. You should really see them when they get pushed to their very edge; the reactions due to inexplicable desperation. Very funny, indeed.

I've had my own funny moments, and laughing as I reminisced my own actions, thinking of what stupid act I did once. God knows what they think of me after all these couple of years, but I couldn't care less.

Lantak lah. Bukan diorang bagi aku bahagia pun.

But now, I'm just going to sit back and watch other's instead. I don't even have to do anything and people get provoked out of nowhere. Now, that's funny.

I've bawled oceans long ago for some people I thought were my friends. Now, I'm just going to pull the biggest smile on my face for I have found true friends, a true lover and my true self.

I'm going to leave the negativity all behind, and look forward. I feel bad for the so-called friends I used to have if they are crying or cursing or hating now (Wallahualam), but well, I've had my turn.

Maybe it's yours. ;) Allah tu kan Maha Adil.

Good luck.

Sekadar coretan isi hati.

2009-07-03T00:57:00.004+08:00

"People only listen to what they want to listen and believe in what they want to believe in." - Ibu

Tepuk dada, tanya diri.

Ask yourself, to whomever it may concern, aren't you the one being jumpy around me? Oh, and to the other one, I have had enough with you too.

Dapatkan sebuah kehidupan, manusia-manusia yang sangat menyedihkan. XD

Simpang Malaikat 44.

2009-06-30T17:57:00.006+08:00

Semalam, aku mimpi. Aku jarang mimpi2 ni. My sleep has always been dreamless and pitch black; that or either I have no memory of what I dreamt the night before.

Mimpi ni sumpah aku tak mintak jadi! It is a frightening one; even thinking about it gives me goosebumps. Bangun2, aku terduduk punya lah lama. Kot2 aku ni salah mimpi ke. Kot2 betul ke.

Aku mimpi abang besar aku si Nasa meninggal!

Takut dowh. I love Nasa because you can never find another Nasa like him. You can never find his replacement. Aunthentic and pleasant, friendly and vibrant, honest and terrific...I want him to be just fine, and safe.

Are-Tain cakap itu menandakan Nasa tengah kenyang. Ape kes malam2 buta aku mimpi dia, dia dok tengah kenyang? Haha, Josh cakap tu tanda dia panjang umur. Ya ka?

Pakmat Nak Buat Pengumuman Agung!

2009-06-30T17:46:00.003+08:00

Ingin aku ucap tengkiyu banyak2 dekat sahabatku Sexy (nama sebenar: Wan Nor Izzaty), kerana sepanjang karier beliau yang tak berapa panjang tu di kedai Nelson's (Tesco Taiping), beliau telah bertemu Nabilah! Yes, anak pakcik Omar Baki tu!

Aku ade number beliau! Jadi tunggu lah mesej aku dalam Facebook ye :) Terpulanglah nak hiraukan atau simpan nombor baru beliau :)

Dengar khabar nye beliau nak bertunang. Apekejadah?

Change Vol. 2

2009-06-29T22:32:00.002+08:00

I used to care so much about how people would be affected by anything I do.

But then, people don't seem to care about whether I get affected or not. They just keep delivering these shit I don't think necessary at all.

So I tell myself, that why would I bother being nice to people who are not equally or even much nicer to me?

Something just came into my thought: People are like investments. If they give you great benefit, you keep them for long. If they don't, you might as well withdraw from them.

Where in the hell are you?

2009-06-28T18:32:00.003+08:00

cik Nabilah anak pakcik Omar Baki

Hang kat mana? Aku SMS tak jawab. Aku pun tak tau la hang dah pi ceruk mana. Entah ada ke tak kat Taiping ni.

Eish, main ting-ting-hilang dengan aku naa...

Aku rindu hang gila-gila, hang tau dak? Eish, takdak teman merapu. Are-Tain ade atok. Aku?

NAB, aku cari jugak ko. Ko tunggu la.

Oh My Bee!

2009-06-28T00:52:00.004+08:00

Not going to review Transformers 2: Revenge of The Fallen. I think a lot of bloggers have done the job, be it a good review or not. The best one yet is just to go and have a try and watch the movie. Anyway, I have to admit I enjoyed it so freaking much!

Spectacular cinematography and I totally dig the smooth movements of the robots.

Amazing gila! I have to go and watch it again!

I just want to say that I love Bumblebee! *does the annoying OMG rants*

HE IS HELL CUTE & ADORABLE. Such a pet! Are-Tain, aku nak curik Bumblebee daripada ekau! Mwahahahahahahar!

I so wanna date Bumblebee :))

Hot stuff weh.

Gee.

2009-06-27T00:56:00.002+08:00

"I'm gonna wash that girl right outta my hair!"

- Gerard Arthur Way.

18 Days

2009-06-26T15:55:00.002+08:00

9th June '08 - 26th June '08

"It's been 18 days,
Since I've had to look at myself,
I don't wanna have to change,
If I don't then, no one will,
Is it my state of mind?
Or is it just everything else?
I don't wanna have to be here,
I don't understand it now,

Cause it's been 18 days...
Since I first held you,
But to me it feels just like-
It feels like a lifetime,
I'm trying hard to re-arrange
Some say it's the hardest thing to do,
But that's another 18 days,
Without you.

Time after time,
I've been through this.
You show me what it means to live,
You give me hope when I was hopeless,
As my days fade to night,
I remember that state of mind,
I'm soaring straight into your heart,
And I'll fly high.

And I know what they say,
About all good things,
Will they come to an end?
But I'll fight this time,
So that we might,
Have a chance at this.

Cause it's been 18 days,
Since I'd look at myself,
I don't wanna have to change
If I don't then, no one will

Cause it's been too many days,
Since I first held you,
But to me it feels just like-
It feels like a lifetime .
I'm trying hard to re-arrange,
Some say it's the hardest thing to do,
But that's just too many days without you.

And I know what they say,
About all good things,
Will they come to an end?
But I'll fight this time.
So that we might,
Have a chance at this."

-18 Days, Saving Abel

R.I.P. Dixie

2009-06-25T14:45:00.003+08:00

I just knew about this and I have to say it's rather a painful loss.

My Chemical Romance's drummer, Bob Bryar, is filing a lawsuit against the dog trainer whom he sent his German Shepard mix dog Dixie to for a week, only to receive her cremated remains back. Bob claimed the trainer changed the stories of his dog's death many times and the trainer as well clearly enough is at fault for cremating Dixie without his permission.

I mean, come on; why the hell would someone burnt something? Yes, to destroy evidence ;) Something bad must have happened to Dixie and the ones responsible didn't want Bob to know.

Three words, I have, for the dog trainer:
Bodoh punya orang.

R.I.P. Dixie

After one week.

2009-06-23T17:58:00.002+08:00

I have never really been outside of home with friends, to date since I arrived in Taiping.

Haha, but I guess getting to communicate online is pretty acceptable. THANK GOD for social networking, and YouTube for that matter. Oh yeah, man! What would I do without Blogger too! I mean look at how many times I have been changing the pics up there. Shannimal rules right now, and that's a darn hot picture so I refuse to replace it.

I need to get out. Maybe catch Transformers 2: Revenge of the Fallen.

Anyone?

I miss you.

2009-06-21T04:09:00.002+08:00

I do.

For all the passing seconds that held me and you.

For the moments of laughter we shared.

For all the cries we poured.

For all the effort we made, the obligations we faced.

For all the trust and the love we exchanged.

For all the pain we collectively embraced.

For the fruits of joy we collectively reaped.

I miss you...

...and I love you.

In dedication to the people that really matter to me. To that special someone, live your life and persevere. You know I do feel the same about you.

FUR: An Imaginary Portrait of Diane Arbus, Reviewed.

2009-06-20T00:14:00.008+08:00

One word: Fantastic.

I love this movie, and hated it for the ending. Why the hell my favourite characters in literature flicks seem to have to be dead by the end of everything?!

(the real Diane Arbus)

I didn't know who the hell is Diane (pronounced as Dee-Ann) Arbus until I Wiki her name. She is one of the most influential American photographer known for her interest of taking disturbing, weird pictures. (Ring a bell? Me? I don't know, you tell me ;] ) Oh, and she's dead so she won't be criticizing this movie. I'll do the job.

The movie is about discovering yourself deep within. Not sure if the movie is true or just fictional even though Diane Arbus is a real person. Diane, in the movie, is a photography graduate but instead of doing her own photography projects, she's assisting her husband Allan. After all the effort of keeping her dissatisfaction of her life to herself, conforming to traditions and the many sleepless nights, she wanted to start her own project. Hubby gave green light!

Before...

After! You see, hairy men are sometimes hottie material!

She was so intrigued by her new neighbour Lionel Sweeney who actually looked like Chewbacca! Lionel had hypertrichosis (I spelled it right, right?); that super-hairy disorder thingy and was once in the Circus Freak shows. Oh, and he has this other problem that I don't know what it's called; his lungs shrink as he got older. Not to be mistaken with asthma, people.

Knowing Lionel brought out the true Diane Arbus; who's fascinated by special looking people that the societies at the moment deem ugly. Oh, and of course there is a love story. Movie cliches.

I won't tell how that someone mentioned died. It'll spoil the fun! Go figure. This movie is seriously awesome.

Ibu and parking.

2009-06-19T22:27:00.003+08:00

Janji masuk! Haha.

Kata putus.

2009-06-18T18:56:00.002+08:00

"Go UK first. Then you go USA."

...that was Mom's ultimatum after much healthy debates about which country has much better people.

Apparently, you can't mention USA to her. She doesn't like people from that side of the world.

Come on! It's USA! There are all kinds of people there, and so it is the best place to gain understanding of the human race ;)

Life will be hard, I know. But well, I'll take the risk. I want to challenge myself and see how much I can endure.

Heating up in home

2009-06-17T17:49:00.003+08:00

TAIPING PANAS LAH!

My goodness. Apa sudah jadi?

What an ambition.

2009-06-15T02:16:00.006+08:00

My life's most impossible dream:
Work with a touring crew; preferably the Riot Squad.

I know! I know! To an extent it sounded ridiculous. But I really wish I can do it. For a year or half is enough!

"How do I get an internship at riot squad?"

"E-mail us at internships@riotsquad.com telling us a little about yourself, what you'd like to do, and when you are available to work. You must be in college and be eligible to receive credit for your internship. The internship is unpaid and is located in Los Angeles, California. We are looking for motivated, hard working people who are passionate about music and want to work in the music industry."

- Copied & pasted from Riot Squad's Official Website

Unpaid, but still, it's a money-can't-buy life experience you won't get everyday.

In the wisdom words of Alicia Simmons (guitar tech for World's Most Hated Crew);

"It's probably the hardest thing any human can go through. It's the most grueling thing ever. Everyday seems like the worst one yet. I don't really recommend it to many people. Sure it's all fine and dandy you get to hang out with so many bands in the parking lot at the end of the night, and some of those people will be people you REALLY look up to and can't even believe you have the opportunity to MEET them, but honestly, you are more concerned about being in your bus in the air conditioning or taking a shower than giving two shits about who's hanging out where and on what bus. Trust me, it's not all fun and games at all. Being a girl out there is even much harder. You gotta be tough, a lot of dudes and chicks are lonely on that tour, and are all about summer lovin' and 90% of girls on the tour end up seeing someone by the end. It's a LONG 3 months to spend alone. But I'll tell you straight up; if you stay to yourself the whole tour and just befriend everyone and not hook up with anyone, at the end of the tour everyone and their moms want to be your best friend and you'll get 385734085 job offers. Think of it as the ultimate test. It's tough, and a lot of days you need a shoulder to cry on. Yes, CRY. But if you ever end up on tour, stay strong and it pays off. It pays off to stay tough, learn how to move on and put things behind you, how to prepare for worst case scenarios, how to be one of the guys, how to respect peoples space and belongings, how to pack a suitcase better than anyone else in the entire world, and how to handle a lot of real life situations outside of touring and amazing people's skills in general. It's kinda like survival skills 101, but all bunched into a VERY small chunk of time. You learn fast; you have to. It's not all as glamorous as it all may look. It's still a REAL JOB and it's hard, especially when it feels like everything is going the right direction, something can happen to knock you back down to square one. Stick to it, BE STUBBORN, it pays off. Trust me."

***
**
*
*

Far-fetched much? Haha. It is an aspiration yet to be conquered ;) Wish me luck, or at least wish that I'll get enough money to support me through out the entire journey :P

17 Again

2009-06-14T03:40:00.003+08:00

NOTE:
Whoever says Zac Efron is the next Jared Leto is apparently blind.

Anyway, the movie is enjoyable. Haha, Zac Efron's acting is pretty good. I still think he has to break away from all those high school shit, famous kid in school, basketball team bla bla bla.

Do something like Daniel Radcliffe! He went threadless for Equus! I wasn't saying that Zac should go nayyy-kedd. Do something that is not High School Musical. If you want to stay relevant in Hollywood, you have to colour you resume.

I think this movie is really good in terms that it shows how important a father's role in the children's lives and how Dads can stop putting the blame on their family on anything that goes wrong.

What a very coincidental movie.

Famous quote of the movie: "Hey, Mom. This is Mark. Uncle Ned's bastard."

Boohoo!

2009-06-12T03:49:00.003+08:00

Too many fun things to do!

Too little time...

:(

Somebody's been reading so avidly at this hour.
I find that amazing, really.
This one isn't much of a reader, but when it takes an initial step, it ain't stopping ;]

Bagus, bagus. Keep going, Mok!

Think Happy Thoughts: Updated [ 1 ]

2009-06-09T01:43:00.002+08:00

I have updated the blog.

The new continuing fiction has made its debut.

The fiction is entitled 'To The End From Yesterday', and it is a slash fiction. Slash as in it is My Chemical Romance and 30 Seconds to Mars combined.

Thank you :]

My Way Home Is Through You

2009-06-07T03:25:00.003+08:00

This song reminds me of death.

Always.

It gets to me better than the song "Bila Izrail Datang Memanggil". I think I realize the truth behind the veil of the song words after listening to it a lot since my Grandpa passed away.

I like to think that the song serves a purpose; that the world is drawing to an end. What are we doing to go 'home'? Are we ready for 'home'?

Gonna take off all my skin,
Tear apart all of my insides
When they rifle in,
Mom and Dad think you'll be saved
They never had the time
They're gonna medicate your lives
You were always born a crime
We salute you in your grave

Can't find my way home
But it's through you and I know
What I'll do
Just to get back in your arms

(My rifle fires seven different shades of shit.
So what's your favorite color, punk?)

Do you wanna hold my hand?
Could you sign this photograph?
'Cause I'm your biggest fan
Would you leave me lying here?

We're not here to pay a compliment
And sing about the government
Oxycontin genocide
Adolescent suicide
Give him my sincerity
Don't give a fuck about a Kennedy
Here's what I got to say:

Can't find my way home
But it's through you and I know
What I'll do
Just to get back in your arms

- My Chemical Romance

Monsters & Montana

2009-06-06T03:24:00.003+08:00

Two movies back-to-back!

Hannah Montana and Monsters Vs. Aliens.

Verdict: Satisfactory!

Hannah Montana
Surprisingly, the movie is very entertaining. I wish I had a Dad like Papa Cyrus. He's one awesome dad! Miley Cyrus was great through out the movie. Teaches you to be whoever you want to be but stay strong to your roots ;)

Monsters Vs. Aliens
Great laugh all the way! It was hilarious! I could have jumped out of my seat laughing at the witty dialogues! Must-watch!

Nanantok. (Sleepy)

2009-06-01T10:44:00.002+08:00

I did not sleep the night before. Coffee helps but not as strong as always.

Looking at the notes, my eyeballs roll...my eyes are slowly shutting.

Goal: Go back hostel after exam and sleep. Fuck la whatever is next.

Terminator Salvation, Reviewed.

2009-05-30T18:17:00.003+08:00

I would give this flick a four out of five. It is great, overall. Before watching this, reviews claimed that Christian Bale did not shine. I can see why.

Christian Bale did his always-awesome job. He nailed it as John Connor. The problem is, this movie focus too much on John Connor's teenage version dad, Kyle Reese, and also a new type of terminator, the T-800.

This movie is focusing about the advancement Skynet has made to eliminate human race. T-800 is their newest and by far the most deceptive terminator.

Oh, and the Governor of California looks very CGI as the new programmed T-800. I don't think a governor would have so much time left for a cameo shoot ;)

P/S: The little girl in the movie named Star is so adorable!

Angels & Demons (SPOILER ALERT!)

2009-05-24T02:12:00.006+08:00

Went with my buddy Farah Diba, since she said she had never watched cinemas in Malaysia before. I took her to Mid Valley Megamall. Give me an applause because it is my first time going somewhere in KL without a male assistance :)

So, summarizing everything, the movie was following only 60% of the entire novel. There is no Leonardo Vetra, there is no Hassassin, there is no Maximillian Kohler. Initial plot line was also different and you won't get to see that high-tech plane that was mentioned in Dan Brown's original masterpiece. You'll only get a helicopter -_-"

Other than that, everything was according to the book and this time it was well-edited! No silly shit like what happened to poor Da Vinci Code. The only sucky part was that Cardinal Baggia was alive in the movie and got elected as the new Pope when he was supposed to die in the book.

The assassin was CAUCASIAN in the movie, but he was supposed to be some Middle-East dude who has a penchant for voyeurism and sado-masochism, and hires high-class prostitutes to reward himself after each success of carrying out the evil plan. He was supposed to be fearless, but the movie dude was stupid. However, I have to salute Ewan McGregor for his glorious acting as Camerlengo Ventresca. He nailed it, man! I was almost fooled by his character as how I was fooled reading the book!

Anyway, it was good as a movie. If it was to be made exactly like the book, it would have been a flop, I believe.

So movie-goers who want to to know what exactly is going on in the book, go figure! Both version are slightly different but both are good :)

Obi Wan! You RULEZ leh!

Aiyoyo.

2009-05-23T06:37:00.005+08:00

I love My Chemical Romance a lot, so I tried listening to a few songs by a band called LeAthermouth. LeAthermouth is another band that the rhythm guitarist (Frank Iero) of My Chemical Romance are involved with, and he is LeAthermouth's lead singer.

LeAthermouth.
Frank is the one in the fridge. The rest are anonymous.

My Chemical Romance.
Frank is the one holding Gerard Way's leg.

After listening to "5th Period Massacre" and "Catch Me If You Can, Mr. Lusk"...

...YES. That was my first impression.

Analysis:

Too much screaming.
Too much screaming.
Too much screaming.
I don't understand what Frank was singing.
I thought I heard 'Rape me!' when it's actually 'REVENGE!'
Too much screaming.

My goodness. What the hell. I prefer Slipknot than this any day. It's just not my cuppa.

Gosh!

Let's try Pencey Prep!

Think Happy Thoughts

2009-05-16T03:01:00.010+08:00

I have a new fan fiction site and the crazily worked-on one-shot fiction is currently up in the page. If you have time, do drop by and have a glimpse. It's still new.

If it's good, or bad by any means, let me know ;) The comment section is open for everyone, so no worries. No OpenId required whatsoever; you can remain anonymous all you want, people. Feel free to read and comment. All contents are PG rated, I guess. I've stopped writing R rated ones, LOL.

Had a chat with Donielle moments ago and she told me something that I guess was the most wonderful feedback I've gotten from my writing: what I wrote made people happy, sad, excited and all the other emotions human beings can ever feel; and many people who read what Donielle & I wrote together were inspired to write their own stories. I went whoa for a minute; I never thought we both gave such an impact. It definitely feels great that it has created that tiny push within these people to explore what they can possibly do.

Thank you, homosapiens.

Click for larger view.
My old fiction in Mibba.com
It has 21 subscribers, 215 readers and 88 comments in the forum.

Click for larger view.
One of the most wonderful feedbacks I have received from those who read what I wrote.

Last but not least, to visit Think Happy Thoughts Fanfictions, you can look for the link in the left sidebar of this blog, or simply click on these boys XD

Clicky!

Wedding Bells

2009-05-14T14:53:00.002+08:00

Here, I'd like to say congratulations to my buddy Donielle for the wonderful news! She is engaged to the man she loves and I'm sorry, Doni cuz I don't know his last name. I should have asked! Damn. The lucky dude's name is Richard.

I hope you guys stay loving together and I'm so happy for you, babe! I still wish I'd get to meet you one day, and I'm thankful to have you as my friend, through thick and thin. All the fun we had together writing is something I won't ever forget, despite all the short-term-memory-loss I've been getting. LOL. I love you, Doni. I hope you have a wonderful union with Rich ;)

P/S: Looking forward to the existence of Gerard Jr. or Rebekah ;)

Twitter.

2009-05-10T16:57:00.002+08:00

"I yell at my GPS like it were a real person. That's how you know it's actually hate, when you don't realize you're doing it." - Mikey Way

"The quote: "The future's so bright, I gotta wear shades" should only describe the lifestyle of either a teenage vampire, or doing tons of coke." - Frank Iero

"Within 15 seconds of playing X-Box Live, I got called a n****r, a homo and was told I sucked by a 10-year-old. Is this really the future of gaming??" - Ray Toro

"Yesterday was Wesak and today's a Sunday. Poslaju's having a rest. Great." - SJLau

Recap. Long entry.

2009-05-07T20:06:00.016+08:00

Whoa.

It has been a while since I last blogged. Internet has been really shitty, so pardon me. Since my last entry, many things have taken place and by now, I might have forgotten some.

Note to self: Draft the blog on Word, Ctrl+C, and Ctrl+V on Blogger!

Forgetting ideas is not fun, really. I don't like writer's block. Thank God for pictures; they help improve my memory. I think I've been consuming too much mono sodium glutamate.

To begin with, I shall describe the second Pesta Ria of my life; and first one for my sisters. Due to the limited span of time, I didn’t really experience a whole lot. There were still kiosks selling stupid things like balloons for freaking RM 2.50. Really, it’s a waste of money. I was glad my sisters didn’t force me to buy them. “Tak mau la. Buat ape la beli angin RM 2.50. Angin free je. Buang duit. Nanti ibu marah.” They nodded, “Betul, betul. Kita beli aiskrim je la. Boleh makan.”

The school has changed a lot since the last time I was there. More primped than before. Classy konon la. The new Pesta Ria as well lasted for 2 days; and the first day lasted until nighttime. Sau Chi texted me, asking me to follow her and the rest to the school fashion show but I had to decline. I was there the morning and with Opah around, I can’t go out at night or she will start the World War II for the consecutive time. Pesta Ria '09 was okay for me, so to say. Met some old teachers, significant ones. My sisters were so into the Ghost House, which would only be launched at 2pm that they proposed I let them skip school and I blatantly rejected. “Amboi. Mana boleh ponteng-ponteng.” The so-called ‘ghosts’ made their first appearance at the canteen, walking around clad in black, wearing ghost masks, and Bata school shoes.

Back in KL, there was a week where I felt like I lived in Japan. The Geek and Miss Kedah took me to Sakae Sushi (that one with the green frog logo, and looked like Miss Kedah herself), and I loved the experience; the computerized ordering system and all. Sakae Sushi has much more variety though, compared to Sushi King. I ordered Enoki Niku Maki; a dish of Enoki mushrooms wrapped in beef rolls and smeared with Teriyaki sauce. It tasted okay but what made the dish terrible was the fact that the beef was not friendly to chew. Memang sah-sah kena maki lepas tu.

The next day, we went to Berjaya Times Square and ate at Teppanyaki. DAMN THAT BLOODY PARTICULAR RESTAURANT. I SWEAR I WILL NOT GO THERE ANYMORE. I ordered for Niku Soba and they gave me the noodle that is clearly not soba. It’s the noodle for Wanton Mee for God’s sake! BAAAAAAAAAAAADDDDD MANAGEMENT OF QUALITY. That turned me off for a while, until Miss Kedah's Salmon Teppanyaki caught my attention. Really, really terrible, weh.

I’m sure Limkokwing students were aware of the news of my African housemate’s death. No, if you ask me, she did not pass away in the apartment we all lived in. She passed away in Africa, just after arriving there. During her memorial service at the university’s Hall of Fame, I learned that she had been terribly ill for weeks and didn’t look too happy after returning from Lesotho for this semester. No idea why she got sick; they said she lacked iron but she ate with full appetite though. I’m sorry for her family back home, knowing she had two daughters who are still growing up. I know she and I had rough moments back then due to cultural differences, but she was one of the nicest people I have met.

My faculty recently held a meeting at the Hall of Fame too, with all the students. I appreciated their effort to actually hold such a meeting to discuss about any problems that students were experiencing and taking steps to improve. Some students gave remarkable comments that I couldn’t help but to just agree. Some were just complaining as if they know everything, when they obviously don’t. They complained about the usage of Windows Vista in the campus lab and my, my; SINCE WHEN THERE IS WINDOWS VISTA IN THE LAB? The lab has been loyal users of Windows XP. MACINTOSH is not VISTA la. Aiyooo. To complain about Photoshop and design study is even worse. These foreign students probably were too often spoon-fed that they think everything should be easy peasy for them. Poor Mitchell Liong (the head of the faculty); after distributing his phone number and having the courage to take personal comments from students, THIS really shouldn’t be done. Whoever did this is just plain pathetic.

Drinking

2009-04-16T18:06:00.002+08:00

I admit that many of my friends, regardless of what are their religion, drink. I won't name names, nor point out any racial issues.

To me, as a Muslim, it is banned. Therefore, I believe God has a reason why it is banned. Why argue? Because normally it is human nature to create an excuse to allow something that should not be done, suddenly okay to be committed. An alibi for it? People like this will usually say "As long as you are in control."

But how far do you know you are in control? *shrugs* Not many have the ability to control themselves. Excuses can come in many forms.

People can drink if they want to, and don't have to question me why I think Muslims shouldn't drink. It's written in the laws of my own religion. I'm born to stand out. I don't have to drink just to fit in.

The Day I Ate Sushi

2009-04-14T22:12:00.007+08:00

To be honest, it wasn't so bad but definitely not a favourite. Unless if I'm desperate or forced under certain circumstances; e.g. peer pressure, I won't step into any sushi place and dine.

This has to be the most productive holiday I've ever had back in Taiping. It would be better if Farah Beg Merah and Soya Yee were there.

The day after I arrived home, I went out to meet Josie at Starbucks, and we spotted Chiew Bee! After quite a while, Sauchi arrived and took us ronda-ronda.

Today, we went out again! Surprise, surprise- they took me to Sushi King. For people who know me quite well, I've been disgusted with the idea of eating food that is not properly cooked. However, I took up the challenge and agreed to eat after staring at the Salmon Sushi that Sauchi picked for me. After all, there was this Sushi Bonanza thingy going on.

It tasted ok, but a tad salty. I think it's the rice. Or the sweet sauce. I forgot the name. I didn't try the sour sauce because Sauchi added wasabi inside it. It looks yuckie. LOL.

The drink we got was Green Tea; as in really really Green Tea. No added preservatives. Pick between hot and cold. I picked cold. It managed to wash away that salty taste in my mouth.

My face while gobbling the sushi.

My attempt to pick the sushi up with chopsticks was hopeless. Sauchi was laughing at me. I was wondering if anyone saw me. LOL. Oh, and there was this sushi that I can tolerate. It has this fried tempura fish ball on top of the rice, and on top of the fish was a drop of mayonnaise and really tiny red fish eggs.

After that, Sauchi left to pick up her sister. I trailed Josie to Starbucks where she bought this Darkberry Frappucino. It tasted weird. Later we went to Maxis Centre in Taiping Sentral (where Josie works) and I spent hours there just leaving my cell phone to be charged. I made many new friends among the tauke kedai. There was this kakak next door and she was working in Songkin Boutique, there was also this dude in front of Maxis Centre who opened his laptop for me and Josie to use when we got bored.

My mom texted me later and asked me to buy 3 packets of black pepper seasoning, so I made my way to Tesco on foot and bumped into Noien and her mother! Reunion, reunion!

Tomorrow, I might be out again. LOL.

I seriously had fun!

Taiping

2009-04-13T00:57:00.002+08:00

I am back in Taiping, but not for so long. Still, it won't be a jolly holiday for me since I have to think of the assignments. I should be starting.

There's a PSA script to write but I guess it will be pretty easy-peasy-pumpkin-peasy. Nasa jangan goyang kaki. Hang partner aku. There is an individual Biz Law assignment, and there is also the interview that I'm supposed to do with an uncle *ahem ahem*. He reads this every day so, please confirm me a date ;)

Oh, if you're asking about the girl on top of my page recently (if it was taken down, I have my reasons), SHE IS A WHORE.

Wanna find her and give her slap on my behalf? Let me know. I can give you the concrete reason why she deserves a slap or even more.

a fool

2009-04-11T21:28:00.002+08:00

Sing that Bert McCracken song, dude. "Liar, liar...pants on fire."

Mid Term

2009-04-03T17:34:00.002+08:00

I can't believe myself. It's already week 6! Not all subjects have mid terms though.

I THANK GOD BIZ LAW ISN'T. I'd be totally screwed if we have mid terms for Biz Law.

Week 7 will be the mid term week. Week 8 is when I'll probably go home to good 'ol Taiping! Gotta see how my little siblings are doing now. One of them is taking UPSR soon. I wonder if he's still busy drawing cartoons when he's supposed to study.

I'm supposed to study too lol.

Fever

2009-03-31T20:39:00.002+08:00

Musim demam. Kalau musim buah tu best la jugak. Ni musim demam. LOL.

Tiqa demam. Cranky habis makcik tu. Tambah pulak pancaindera dia tak berjalan dengan lancar. LOL.

Nasa pun demam. Gedik gila la kalau dia demam. Merengek macam budak kecik. Tergolek sana, tergolek sini. Penampar sebijik baru tau. Mengadu kat aku macam aku boleh je bagi ubat free kat dia. LOL tapi kesian jugak kat dia.

Josh pun demam. Sengal sendi tangan. Takut denggi, dia cakap. LOL. Celah mana dia nampak bintik merah tu pun tak tau la. Makan pun tak betul. Sikit-sikit muntah. Kesian...

Aku dah demam lama dah. LOL. Demam flu je. Dah baik dah pun. Tu pun Josh bagi jangkit tu. Adui.

Terasa

2009-03-31T03:40:00.002+08:00

Entah. Malam ni banyak pulak aku terasa. Macam-macam lah.

Aku dah sampai tahap tak tau lah nak buat apa lagi.

Benda kecik ada. Benda besar ada.

Mula2 cakap terasa dipulaukan dengan aku. Dah aku nak patch it up, aku pulak rasa dipulaukan.

Lepas baca blog Are-Tain, aku rasa Alhamdulillah lah aku tak sampai tahap macam tu nak menyebut nama. Aku rasa takde hak nak buat macam tu.

Aku tak reti la nak jadi jahat gila babi. Aku tak sampai hati.

Hairan jugak bila ada yang cakap aku keras hati. Keras tang mana tu? Ego siapa paling top pun aku tak tau. Seego-ego aku, aku buat jugak muka tak malu tanya betul ke dia terasa. Dia buat tak tau macam aku ni cakap Tamil pulak.

Entah. Pening aku.

yawns

2009-03-29T18:11:00.002+08:00

I just woke up. Whoa, look at the time! Gila ah... I wonder if Zuan is back yet from clubbing.

I can say he was actually so desperate to go clubbing. Me & Eqa sat together, Facebook-ing till wee hours like nobody's business.

Oh, and the fact that he SMS-ed the number plat of the car that picked him up from hostel yesterday was surprising. Tak sedap hati kot?

LOL, at least it would be something I can use if I have to make a police report and said Zuan has gone missing since he went out for clubbing.

Thought of the minute: What to eat eh? I fear to go to the management and pick up my parcel because I haven't paid the hostel rent yet and I DO NOT WANT THEM TO CONFISCATE MY PHONE OR MY LAPTOP. No farking way!

Apekejadah

2009-03-29T06:37:00.003+08:00

Wajar ke buat sebegitu hatta sekadar memenuhi permintaan yang agak biasa?

Jawapannya agak luar biasa. Terkejut jugak aku dibuatnya. Bukan main gah lagi beraksi.

Tak faham aku. Dunia tengah jadi makin pelik untuk dirungkai.

Manusia, manusia. Macam-macam ada.

Earth Hour. Konon.

2009-03-28T23:12:00.003+08:00

DESTINATION: CAPSQUARE, KL.

TIME: EVENING TILL LATE.

ENTHUSIASTS: KHALISA, ZUAN, NASA, BLOODYHONEY28, JOSH & EQA.

OUTCOME: NOTHING.

Everything just went bananas. Nasa didn't get his car. Zuan was in Damansara. Khalisa was busy with another event. Josh, Eqa and I were about to go until Zuan said he's not going.

But hey, still; Imagine if everything just went black. How uncivilised suddenly things would be. Not necessarily things lah. People. Kot. Kot lah.

It's gonna take a huge effort to actually make it work.

Damn.

2009-03-27T21:46:00.003+08:00

"Have you guys heard?" Zuan asked Nasa and I as he got into the car.

"Ape?" Nasa turned behind.

"Konsert tu cancelled."

"BABI!" I exclaimed.

"Wahtderfark! Apesal cancelled?" Nasa asked.

"IDK. Ezziq just told me," Zuan replied.

DAMN. Kiranya aku tahu...sudah aku tidur di rumah. jatuh saham betul la konsert tu. Memang susah la sikit ko nak dapat derma disebabkan kidney failure ko tu, Encik Kitso oii...

It's time.

2009-03-16T01:57:00.004+08:00

For a breakaway.

Maybe it is the best thing to do right now.

I'm sorry but I never meant to hurt anyone. You can keep your dirty little secrets because I have no interest already to dig them. Keep all the sneaking out to yourself. I don't think the explanation is relevance after discovery.

It's amazing to see how something great turned out to be pretty ugly.

Saya penat.

2009-03-15T02:16:00.002+08:00

Sangat-sangat penat dengan manusia punya perangai.

"Dapatkan hidup", manusia-manusia sekalian.

Dengan seriusnya.

p/s: Apa jenis BM la aku pakai ni? Wakakakaka.

Change

2009-03-14T02:43:00.002+08:00

It's pretty baffling that when you have changed, people suddenly think there shouldn't be any change. When things were not up to their expectations, they demanded for change.

I have changed, yet again; in certain aspects. People called me childish, controlling, lazy, arrogant, spoilt, etc when they don't actually put themselves in my shoes, when they don't go through what I have gone through. However, I changed. I want to make people happy.

Still, people give me double-standard treatments.

It makes me wonder, if there is still anything wrong with me.

I'm not mad or angry. I'm just sad. Sad because I have so much faith in people, yet people don't even care.

Perhaps lying has become a part of them.

"We must be the change we want to see."
- Mahatma Gandhi.

I wish you were right, Gandhi, because it doesn't seem to be so for me now.

Reversified.

2009-03-13T02:31:00.002+08:00

My prayers have been answered. (epiphany, pfft! LOL)

The old, macho me is back! Yay!

Finally, I am immune to crying. I have finally managed to discuss things better.

Thank you, you three; and any one else indirectly involved.

Live in the now is what I am going to do. Some things are better left alone.

After 2 weeks in campus...

2009-03-11T02:39:00.002+08:00

Everything is pretty much okay. It's been a while since I last blogged. Sorry for that, if I ever kept anyone of you waiting for new entries. I have no idea when the hell am I going to get myself that freakin' Maxis Broadband. Thank goodness I won't be paying for it alone.

To start with, I am taking 6 subjects this semester:

Fundamentals of Organizational Behaviour
Principles of Business Law
Writing for Mass Media
Public Relations Principles
Communication In The New Economy

Just struggling to finish pronouncing one subject takes 3 seconds. Let alone spending 2 hours or more with the subject itself.

I enjoyed Public Relations Principles, thanks to Ms. Vaneetha. She made it fun for me, well; I think she's fun! I never slept in her class or get annoyed.

Yes, I do get annoyed in one particular class and I'm not naming the subject. The lecturer is terrible. Wahtderfark is wrong with her?! I wish Fuad was in the class to keep on debating with her about the relevance of her examples and explanations. I simple cannot, because she's so k*****. ( please do not mind me for my vulgarity)

I think she doesn't like me and Tiqa because we give weird looks when she explains something that we know is not making any sense at all.

She ruins the subject and my Mondays. Damn.

Oh, and I've figured out what to do with my hair. CRASHministerofpropaganda, thanks for the indirect inspiration ^_^

Home

2009-02-14T18:18:00.002+08:00

Is where I most prefer to be at right now.

But I have to return to that city, have to go south...just to continue my studies.

"Just go and study. Nothing else matters. Study," is only what my Mother can say to me. She knows how unprepared I am to be heading back to KL.

SAYA TAMAU BALIK KL!!!

Valentine's Day

2009-02-14T00:54:00.004+08:00

Means nothing to me, actually.

:/

Love is an everyday celebration. You don't need just one day.

Maybe in the next 10 months we can flip through the newspapers and see news about newly born babies thrown away like garbage.

Reality bites, people.

This ain't love.

Confessions of An Ex-Abortionist

Warning to the evil rats

2009-02-11T15:31:00.003+08:00

RATS, BEWARE!
I am much more evil than you think ^_^

Happy 20th Birthday, Yape!

2009-02-11T00:19:00.003+08:00

YOU ARE 20!!!

You get older faster than me, LOL!
Wishing you a MAYJAH BIRTHDAY, hoping that we will be great buddies like always!
Take care over there, hun. I miss you always.
*hugs & kisses*

Happy Birthday, Encik Dill!

2009-02-10T19:29:00.004+08:00

I FORGOT HOW OLD YOU HAVE TURNED THIS YEAR.

But never mind! You are still my cutest fantasy big brother!
Stay awesome but I'd love to say, I don't like your songs post-The Click Five.
Anyway, stay rockin' and maintain that lovely biceps you have! I know Joey's jealous of you but hey, I still love you as always!

No, you're not getting any Superman tees. Ask Josie for presents.
Oh, and sing that birthday song with Joey!
...
...
...
..
.
.

I am a machine.

2009-02-09T23:07:00.000+08:00

"No longer living, just a shell of what I dreamed."

Unfinished

2009-02-07T22:09:00.002+08:00

My old friends will definitely know this habit of mine. My mind is somewhat wild. I jump from one idea to another. I dissolve into a brand new idea and elaborate it, but could not finish it once another new idea pops out. Thank goodness I do not do this with men.

My fan fictions; to be exact. I have a number of them that are not done yet. Everything's hanging with no continuation. Lack of motivation is to blame and I get distracted pretty easily with newer ideas.

Makes me wonder when the hell am I publishing my own novel? When will I get the time to write it and finish it?

My basic excuse whenever my mother questions me about it is this: "Dan Brown took years to finish The Da Vinci Code. The whole thing takes time."

Yeah, it is downright true but then; how long shall I procrastinate? My fictional assassin needs his second killing. I should deliver that to him, with style and substance.

Is my assassin ready anyway? Is my plot already firm?

Am I supposed to bleed?

2009-02-07T14:04:00.001+08:00

So I run, hide and tear myself up
Start again with a brand new name
And eyes that see into infinity

I will disappear
I told you once and I'll say it again
I want my message read clear
I'll show you the way, the way I'm going

So I run, and hide and tear myself up
Start again with a brand new name
And eyes that see into infinity

I was almost there
Just a moment away from becoming unclear
Ever get the feeling you're gone?

-Capricorn (A Brand New Name); 30 Seconds to Mars

Damn You, Inner Devil.

2009-02-07T13:24:00.003+08:00

To be believed, I have to try something else they believe.

I think I'm okay with that. I can feel the inner devil within whispering to me, planting his seed of doubt. Damn you.

It sounds something like this:

"Imagine. What if they did take you there, after they tested-voila! There is nothing with you!"

All the more reason for me to look like an orang gila.

Penakut

2009-02-07T01:57:00.002+08:00

Susah betul nak explain benda kat orang yang penakut ni. Susah betul nak bagi faham. Untuk sekali je. Padahal dia orang yang paling kita percaya. Tempat mengadu nasib. Tempat bermanja. Untuk kesekian kalinya aku rasa macam aku ni orang gila yang bersusah payah nak bagitahu doktor sakit jiwa yang aku ni tak gila. Gila kan?

Kalau takut, timbul keraguan. Kalau takut, dia beralih pada orang yang dipercayai. Macam dia seorang je yang ada orang yang dia percayai. Macam apa yang aku percayai ni tak betul.

Masalahnya, semua ni bersebab. Kalau tak setuju, susahnya aku jugak.

Apa yang aku cakap, semua dianggap karut. Kenapa? Orang yang dia percayai saja ke yang berhak dipercayai? Berhak diberi peluang menunjukkan dia benar? Aku tak boleh?

Mungkin dia ingat aku taksub. Taksub hapekebendenye? Ingat aku suka-suka reka cerita ke? Aku reka cerita pakai pen dengan buku aje. Tak pakai benda serius macam ni.

Kadang-kadang aku rasa kalau aku kekalkan lah perangai berahsia aku masa kecik-kecik dulu, lagi aman kot jiwa aku.