You're just a sad song with nothing to say.

I used to be close to this girl. I still remember her well. I guess I wouldn't know her if I didn't befriend this Chinese-Indian dude named Sabanjiven in my Form 3 Science tuition, haha. I used to find him cute and thought he was a Malay; obviously because he is mixed. He had this dream of becoming a well-known singer with his Thai-mixed cousin, who wanted to be a well-known DJ! Ambitions; aren't they fun? If you care to watch DiGi Celebriteen (I don't remember what year), he was one of the contestants. Now when I look at him, he has changed so drastically! His commercial name is now BEN. I didn't have pictures of him because who bothered to take pictures of some guy who went to the same tuition with you, right? Or is it just me not bothered? Anyway, managed to steal this picture off his blog;

(Saban @ Ben; far left)

Back to the actual topic, this Chinese friend of mine I knew in school, goes by the initials CMP. So P, if you Google yourself, good luck finding this blog :)

She is actually an okay person, (or am I the only one who thinks she's harmless?) but she took the whole 'trying-to-fit-in' phase way too far to turn back. Can you imagine all those stories and the people she told me she knew were all lies? I don't blame her, but I just think she might have wanted attention. She just did it in the most wrong ways possible. To her, to be admired is to be accepted and loved. Her parents are old, and you know la how old people are. Very judgmental.

I think Noien was the one who managed to confront her and scolded her in public for her lies. Memang kitorang ternganga tengok Noien time tu. Dalam hati aku boleh mengucap je kot. Haha, siapa tak kenal Noien punya perangai? Memang hang kena la dengan dia kalau cakap tak betul, mengumpat-ngumpat ke, cakap belakang ke...sebab dia tak takut. Aku ni nasib je la tak sampai tahap tu. Maybe aku kena belajar la dengan Noien macam mana nak bantai orang. Aku jenis tak sampai hati. Dah tau kena kutuk belakang-belakang pun boleh buat muka kanak-kanak riang dengan orang tu. Aih, sedih no?

After her tales were exposed to be just mere made-ups, she kept a low profile. She disappeared. It was almost SPM, by the way. Students just didn't have to be present for school. When she finally made an appearance, she and I had this talk. She said she understood if I choose to ignore her. I just told her to change and that she didn't have to lie. No one will discriminate her for who she actually is. I mean, I'm not that bloody rich. I don't have to be rich and claim I know famous people to be admired and accepted, or even loved. She doesn't have to, as well.

The last thing she told me was that she would try to change. I was a teeny bit glad, and I hoped she would make it to be perfectly fine on a clean slate. We continued to be friends when other people didn't want to be seen with her. She even told me to please do not forget her; which to this day, I never did.

I wonder where she is now. My friends told me that she was still in Taiping, not doing anything, ignoring people, and pretending that she didn't see them. It was all rumours, you see, but if they were true, I believe she has a reason. Maybe she was ashamed that she was still there, and other people are going places to further studies.

If so, I think she shouldn't be thinking that way. I mean, who knows what is in store for her? I've heard some ugly things about her but then I'd love to see if they are true. Or if she would still lie.

Two years since, I've never really got broken-hearted by friends until I entered college. I thought I wasted my time knowing them but then again, maybe if I didn't know these friends who are using me, lying to me, backstabbing me, secretly trashing me etc., I might never learn.

Thank you. I've learnt a lot about life and people, in general, by knowing you people for the past two years. I felt pity for the people who have not seen that side of you. Really.